Four Truly Great Men.

A wise man once said, "do ordinary things, extraordinarily well".

These men embody that principle.

A dedicated team of pub goers have drunk themselves into the record books by carrying out the longest ever pub crawl.

The four men have just visited their 14,000th pub across the United Kingdom and Republic of Ireland.

They have spent 24 years travelling to every corner of the country and have downed and estimated 84,000 pints of real ale, working out at 21,000 pints each.

The foursome - Peter Hill, 52, John Drew, 45, Karl Bradley, 45, and Joe Hill, 77, began their mission in 1984. Because three of them work, their pub going is confined to Sundays and holidays.

Yet despite their travels, the cheapest pint they have found is only a mile down the road from where they live and costs 89p.

Tim Minchin - 'If You Really Loved Me'.

It Doesn't Work Yet.

The Gender Analyzer automatically determines whether a homepage is written by a man or woman. Spambots, furries, and trolls are not considered.

It also thinks Girl With a One Track Mind is written by a man.

The Onion Puts Things Into Perspective.

Black Man Given Nation's Worst Job.

African-American man Barack Obama, 47, was given the least-desirable job in the entire country Tuesday when he was elected president of the United States of America. In his new high-stress, low-reward position, Obama will be charged with such tasks as completely overhauling the nation's broken-down economy, repairing the crumbling infrastructure, and generally having to please more than 300 million Americans and cater to their every whim on a daily basis. As part of his duties, the black man will have to spend four to eight years cleaning up the messes other people left behind. The job comes with such intense scrutiny and so certain a guarantee of failure that only one other person even bothered applying for it. Said scholar and activist Mark L. Denton, "It just goes to show you that, in this country, a black man still can't catch a break."

Barack Obama Wins US Presidency.

May death come swiftly to his enemies.