The Primate Journal

So I've Joined Twitter.

2009-08-02T19:51:00.004+01:00

£1.

2009-03-11T15:57:00.003Z

A Painting.

2009-03-11T15:50:00.001Z

John Baldessari (American, b. 1931). Tips for Artists Who Want to Sell, 1966-68. Acrylic on canvas. 68 x 56 1/2 in. (172.7 x 143.5 cm).

SturgeonFace.com

2009-03-11T15:48:00.003Z

A website dedicated to people whose grimace makes them look like sturgeon.

It's Not Lupus.

2009-03-11T15:41:00.002Z

BBC:

A new skin disorder caused by use of games consoles has been identified by skin specialists.

The condition, dubbed PlayStation palmar hidradenitis, is described in the British Journal of Dermatology.

Researchers outline the case of a 12-year-old girl who attended a Swiss hospital with intensely painful sores on the palms of her hands.

The girl, who had been using a games console regularly, recovered fully after 10 days of abstinence.

Doctors who examined her at the Geneva University Hospital concluded she had a condition known as 'idiopathic eccrine hidradenitis', a skin disorder that generally causes red, sore lumps on the palms of the hands and soles of the feet.

The condition has been previously found on the soles of the feet in children taking part in heavy physical activity, such as jogging.

It is thought to be linked to intense sweating.

Zen.

2009-03-04T20:06:00.002Z

"Some days there won't be a song in your heart. Sing anyway."

- Emory Austin.

Fat People Cost More to Bury.

2009-03-04T20:02:00.002Z

From the UK Telegraph:

Fat people will cost more to bury than those who are thinner, it has emerged after a British council said it would charge an extra £75 to bury the obese because they take up more space in a cemetery.

Relatives of those with bigger bodies will have to pay £194 instead of the usual £129 fee in Houghton Regis, Beds, the Mirror reported.

Chairman of the council's burial committee Cllr Linda Walmsley described the charge as "unfortunate".

She told the Mirror: "There was a request from the funeral directors who asked what the charge would be for a larger person. I think it is unfortunate. I couldn't say everybody would be willing to pay."

It is the first area in the country to vary burial fees according to the dead person's weight.

Deputy town clerk Stuart Oliver told the Mirror: "I think the action is probably being taken because of limited space in the cemetery."

This is What You Get For Proposing at Wendy's.

2009-03-04T19:56:00.000Z

I'm a sinner and God's a Pervert: Part 2.

2009-03-04T19:41:00.004Z

Furrs For Christ: a forum for Christian furries. Arousal from pretending to be an animal is ok as long as you are in a loving, heterosexual marriage.

The Christian Furry Connector:

The Christian Furry Fellowship is a group of Christians, some furries, some not, who assemble ourselves together for the sake of encouragement, mutual learning, sharing of joy and having fun together. Hosted at St. Fred's Cathedral.

Who is St. Fred, you ask? Why, none other than Mr. Rogers. Seriously.

I'm a sinner and God's a Pervert: Part 1.

2009-03-04T19:35:00.004Z

Maude Flanders has a question for our Christian agony aunt:

Some time ago my daughter forgot to take her laundry from the dryer before taking off for volleyball practice, so I folded them up and went to put them up for her in room.

When I reached in her undergarment drawer and I will be frank, my heart dropped as I found one of those electronic phallic objects in it. They are used to ‘M’ and I didn’t know how to handle the situation. I thought to ask my husband, but didn’t want him to have to go through the embarrassment and anguish of such things. I instead asked several of my close girlfriends, some of who are not Christians, and some of them said this was a normal part of a healthy teen’s lifestyle.

The night I decided to talk to my daughter about all this, I heard well…I heard reason to not go in the room. I believe she was using the device then. Is this really alright behavior for a good girl or do I need to confront her? Please help!

Zen.

2009-03-02T20:13:00.000Z

"Sometimes even the wisest of men and machines can be in error."

- Optimus Prime.

Derp.

2009-03-02T20:07:00.000Z

I Just About Died When He Started Talking About The Little Man.

2009-03-02T20:04:00.001Z

Under The Bridge: Literal Video Version - watch more funny videos

Back to the Future: Alternate Ending.

2009-03-02T20:03:00.000Z

Blind Date.

2009-03-02T19:52:00.004Z

An excerpt from "Unbuttoned: Women Open Up About the Pleasures, Pains, and Politics of Breastfeeding".

"I want to date, but I can't," I told my friend.

"Why not?"

"I'm nursing."

"So?" she said.

"What would I wear?" I huffed. "A nursing bra?"

She laughed.

"No, really," I said. "I'd have to bring my pump along, for after my drink."

Yakuza Deeply Affected by Economic Downturn.

2009-03-02T19:46:00.002Z

From the Economist:

The floundering economy has eaten into revenue from traditional activities that required muscle, such as gambling, prostitution and loan-sharking. To compensate, the groups have ploughed into financial fraud, stock manipulation and cybercrime, giving rise to a new generation of gangster-nerds, more interested in business than blackmail. Still, the yakuza boasts 84,000 members (of whom half are “part-timers”) and is estimated to haul in as much as ¥2 trillion (around $21 billion) annually.

This Blog Will Never Die Zen.

2009-02-28T01:03:00.000Z

Jewish Basketball Players, etc.

2009-02-28T00:59:00.002Z

Obsessed With Jews is a documentary about Neil Keller, "one of the leading authorities on who is Jewish", according his own website.

This Fucking Video is a Fucking Work of Shitkicking Art God Damn.

2009-02-28T00:56:00.003Z

Ex-Masturbators They May Be...

2009-02-28T00:34:00.002Z

... but wankers they will remain forever more.

For Osaka-Like People.

2009-02-28T00:31:00.000Z

Stephen Fry on Swearing.

2009-02-28T00:27:00.000Z

Thank You.

2009-02-28T00:25:00.001Z

If Only Public Transportation Were Like This.

2009-02-28T00:18:00.000Z

7 Awesome Steampunk Appliances.

2009-02-28T00:15:00.002Z

This steampunk computer is a thing of beauty.

Clicky picky linky.

I'll Just Leave This Here.

2009-02-28T00:13:00.000Z

therapistfinder.com

Worth Trying.

2009-02-27T23:30:00.002Z

Bowser.

2009-02-27T23:27:00.001Z

You Gonna get Graped.

2009-02-27T23:21:00.003Z

Tentacle Grape, the most delicious hentai soda in the world. You will want it in you.

Also available, Tentacle Grape condoms.

Now We Know Why Gary Glitters.

2009-02-27T23:12:00.003Z

Police are on the lookout for a dangerously radioactive paedophile.

Detectives are hunting a "radioactive" man who failed to show up for court to face child pornography charges, police said on Friday.

Thomas Leopold, who has been given large doses of radiation for a thyroid condition, has not been since he broke his bail conditions two weeks ago.

A judge at London's Southwark Crown Court has issued a warrant for his arrest after he failed to appear for trial and said his condition could make him dangerous, the Press Association reported.

"Please warn officers that when he is arrested he might be radioactive. This is not a joke," judge John Price said.

Admit It. You Missed Me.

2009-02-27T23:08:00.001Z

Four Truly Great Men.

2008-11-05T12:02:00.002Z

A wise man once said, "do ordinary things, extraordinarily well".

These men embody that principle.

A dedicated team of pub goers have drunk themselves into the record books by carrying out the longest ever pub crawl.

The four men have just visited their 14,000th pub across the United Kingdom and Republic of Ireland.

They have spent 24 years travelling to every corner of the country and have downed and estimated 84,000 pints of real ale, working out at 21,000 pints each.

The foursome - Peter Hill, 52, John Drew, 45, Karl Bradley, 45, and Joe Hill, 77, began their mission in 1984. Because three of them work, their pub going is confined to Sundays and holidays.

Yet despite their travels, the cheapest pint they have found is only a mile down the road from where they live and costs 89p.

Tim Minchin - 'If You Really Loved Me'.

2008-11-05T11:20:00.000Z

It Doesn't Work Yet.

2008-11-05T11:04:00.003Z

The Gender Analyzer automatically determines whether a homepage is written by a man or woman. Spambots, furries, and trolls are not considered.

It also thinks Girl With a One Track Mind is written by a man.

The Onion Puts Things Into Perspective.

2008-11-05T10:59:00.002Z

Black Man Given Nation's Worst Job.

African-American man Barack Obama, 47, was given the least-desirable job in the entire country Tuesday when he was elected president of the United States of America. In his new high-stress, low-reward position, Obama will be charged with such tasks as completely overhauling the nation's broken-down economy, repairing the crumbling infrastructure, and generally having to please more than 300 million Americans and cater to their every whim on a daily basis. As part of his duties, the black man will have to spend four to eight years cleaning up the messes other people left behind. The job comes with such intense scrutiny and so certain a guarantee of failure that only one other person even bothered applying for it. Said scholar and activist Mark L. Denton, "It just goes to show you that, in this country, a black man still can't catch a break."

Barack Obama Wins US Presidency.

2008-11-05T10:58:00.000Z

May death come swiftly to his enemies.

With Apologies To Japan.

2008-08-18T23:01:00.000+01:00

Georgia On My Mind.

2008-08-18T22:52:00.002+01:00

Who says you can't learn anything from Yahoo Answers?

I live in georegia but i dont see rusia no where not even sound but they says theres tanks should i be worrie

i herd on the news that rusia has invaded but i dont see them no where wats going on

A little advice from Iron Maiden:
RUN TO THE HIIIIIIIILS
RUN FOOR YOOUUR LIIIIIIIIIIFE!

I just heard on cnn that Chuck Norris is on the way to help the peeps down in georegia fight off those rushkies..

Nothing can stop chuck norris when hes on a mission to kill, even the invisible, soundless tanks created by the russians

Iz so proud of you! Look at you learnin to use this here computation machine and this here internets. youz like leo from dat movie da matrix an such. umm an such as countries like rusia need to learn peas! you should be worrie... lets help teach them how to love each other an such.

>> Russians are very stealthy creatures. Kind of like ninjas.
>> They are probably hiding in your kitchen right now...
>> give yourself up, they will be merciful.

Mystery Solved.

2008-08-18T22:50:00.000+01:00

2008-08-17T23:24:00.002+01:00

"Few things are more attractive than courage, cheerfulness and optimism. But they take on an extra dimension when you realize that they are not a lucky assembly of character traits, but the result of an act of will — a deliberate attempt to tackle an unkind destiny with strength of purpose and good humor."

- Jane Shilling.

America: Running Out of Reasons Not to Vote For Obama.

2008-08-17T23:14:00.002+01:00

He's apparently too fit to president now.

Speaking to donors at a San Diego fund-raiser last month, Barack Obama reassured the crowd that he wouldn't give in to Republican tactics to throw his candidacy off track.

"Listen, I'm skinny but I'm tough," Sen. Obama said.

But in a nation in which 66% of the voting-age population is overweight and 32% is obese, could Sen. Obama's skinniness be a liability? Despite his visits to waffle houses, ice-cream parlors and greasy-spoon diners around the country, his slim physique just might have some Americans wondering whether he is truly like them.

The candidate has been criticized by opponents for appearing elitist or out of touch with average Americans. A Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll conducted in July shows Sen. Obama still lags behind Republican John McCain among white men and suburban women who say they can't relate to his background or perceived values.

"He's too new ... and he needs to put some meat on his bones," says Diana Koenig, 42, a housewife in Corpus Christi, Texas, who says she voted for Sen. Hillary Clinton in the Democratic primary.

"I won't vote for any beanpole guy," another Clinton supporter wrote last week on a Yahoo politics message board.

The last overweight president to be elected was 335-pound William Howard Taft in 1908. As for tall and lanky presidents, "you might have to go back to Abraham Lincoln" in 1860, says presidential historian Stephen Hess. "Most presidents were sort of in the middle."

What Has Six Arms And Two Legs?

2008-08-17T23:08:00.003+01:00

An octopus.

A study by scientists at Sea Life centres across Europe found that the invertebrates move across the sea bed using their two rearmost limbs, leaving the other six free for the important business of feeding.

Researchers who observed the creatures in action found they push off with the "legs" and then employ the other tentacles to pump themselves along.

The study, the largest of its type carried out, was designed to show if octopuses favoured one side or the other.

But it found that octopuses are ambidextrous, though many seem to favour their third arm from the front to eat with.

Octopuses either swim or crawl across the seabed.

If they need to move fast they can shoot a jet of water from an opening in their body.

Scientists from 20 centres across Europe analysed data from 2,000 observations of common octopuses to get the results.

Claire Little, a marine expert from the Weymouth Sea Life Centre in Dorset, said: "We've found that octopuses effectively have six arms and two legs.

"Observations showed that they use the rearmost two to get around over rocks and the seabed.

"They also use these two legs to push off when they wish to swim, and then other tentacles are used to propel them."

Ok, so what has two arms and three legs?

13 Medal-Worthy Olympic Stories.

2008-08-17T20:42:00.001+01:00

From Mental Floss.

At the 1936 Berlin Games, Japanese pole vaulters Shuhei Nishida and Sueo Oe tied for second place. The teammates were offered the opportunity to have a jump-off for the silver medal, but the two friends declined out of mutual respect for one another. For the purposes of Olympic records, Oe agreed to the bronze while Nishida took the silver.

Upon their return to Japan, the teammates came up with a different solution. The pair had a jeweler cut their medals in half and fuse them back together, creating half-silver, half-bronze pendants. The “Medals of Friendship,” as they’re now known in Japan, are enduring symbols of friendship and teamwork.

I Believe The Children Are Our Future.

2008-08-17T20:25:00.002+01:00

Pic below from Cake Wrecks, a blog dedicated to documenting such disastrous dishes.

Pull Ups.

2008-08-17T20:17:00.000+01:00

The Fresh Prince of Gotham.

2008-08-17T20:16:00.000+01:00

Zen.

2008-07-29T23:35:00.001+01:00

“When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.”

- Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Mr. Mabe.

2008-07-29T23:29:00.000+01:00

Mr Mabe prank calls a telemarketer.

Don't Tase Me Bro?

2008-07-29T23:18:00.003+01:00

Kid falls off bridge and breaks his back. Concerned passersby call 911. Cops arrive. Cops tase half-dead kid 19 times.

Bebo Has Doomed Us All.

2008-07-29T22:53:00.007+01:00

A satellite used to detect asteroids headed for Earth is being shut down so that Bebo users can use it to spam outer space.

It would be irresponsible to assume what could happen should we let our eye off the ball this way.

This isn't even to say what might happen should those Bebo messages catch ET's attention. To an alien, "hEyA bAbE, LuV Ya lyk sooooo much LOL XD" reads like an existential threat*.

Bebo and the TV company behind Wife Swap have teamed up with one of the world's experts in interstellar radio communication, Dr Alexander Zaitsev, to beam 500 messages from users into space in a digital time capsule.

Dr Zaitsev will use a Ukrainian radio telescope, normally used to identify and track asteroids that pose a threat to Earth, to beam the messages to a planet orbiting the star Gliese 581c - 20 light years from Earth - because it is believed to be capable of supporting life.

The Message From Earth project, which launches on August 4, will invite Bebo users, celebrities and politicians to submit messages and pictures that "consider the planet from a fresh perspective" and raise awareness of environmental pressures on our planet.

Whether there is intelligent life elsewhere in the universe remains "one of the greatest unanswered questions", said Dr Zaitsev.

But he added that it would be exciting to see how young people chose to represent humanity and the planet.

"I understand that in the majority of cases these messages may be naïve, but I also hope that we will receive a creative and fresh look at the subject," Dr Zaitsev said.

Conceived by Oli Madgett of RDF Digital, a subsidiary of Wife Swap producer RDF Media, the project claims to be the first to democratically select content to be transmitted into space.

Users can post entries and vote for the best ones on a dedicated Bebo page. The winning 500 will be sent into space.

The vote runs from August 4 until September 30. The digital time capsule with the 500 selected messages will be transmitted on October 9.

*To the rest of us, it just reads like whoever typed it deserves a slow and painful death.

The Tribesmen Who Don't Use Numbers.

2008-07-28T12:18:00.002+01:00

Scientific American:

Counting is one of the first things we teach our kids. I mean, every parent’s probably said, “You had better be in that bed by the time I count to three.” Followed by “One…two…two-and-a-half…” But counting might not be as universal as it seems. Because scientists from M.I.T. have found that a tribe living in the Amazon has no words for numbers.

Back in 2004, the M.I.T. team reported that the Piraha people seemed to have terms that described “one,” “two,” or “many.” This was based on asking tribe members to count objects, like sticks or nuts or AA batteries, as the researchers laid them out. This time, the scientists had the subjects count backward as they removed things. And they discovered that tribe members used the word previously thought to mean “two” for as many as five or six objects. And they used the word “one” for anything less than that. So the words don’t stand for numbers, so much as relative amounts. The findings appear in the online edition of the journal Cognition.

Although the Piraha people might not need numbers, think of what they’re missing. “A large number of trombones led the big parade, with an even larger number of cornets close at hand…”

The British Can Hooliganize Any Sport.

2008-07-28T12:12:00.004+01:00

BBC:

Three male streakers invaded the pitch being watched by the Prince of Wales during an annual society polo event.

The naked trio emerged from the grandstand during a match between England and Australia at the Cartier International event in Windsor.

Two returned to the stand but the third was cheered as he fled stewards and hurdled two metal barriers to escape.

Prince Charles, who was overseeing the event in place of the Queen, watched the spectacle from the royal box.

The Cartier International, held at the Guards Polo Club within the grounds of Windsor Great Park, is one of the most glamorous dates in the social calendar.

Some 25,000 people attended the event, which took place on the hottest day of the year so far.

The intervention of the streakers, who stripped off during the final chukka, temporarily halted play.

However, England went on to win 10-9 and lift the trophy.

England team captain Luke Tomlinson later said it was not the first time he had played in a match interrupted by naked intruders.

"You are so focused on the game you hardly notice. It brings a bit of humour in and the crowd seem to enjoy it," he said.

Zen.

2008-07-27T23:14:00.001+01:00

"Luck is a dividend of sweat. The more you sweat, the luckier you get."

- Ray Kroc.

Little Britain Is Coming To America.

2008-07-27T20:43:00.002+01:00

Below are Tom and Mark, two totally hetero jocks. Click on the pic to see more brand new characters.

Miss Piggy: Fuck The Pain Away.

2008-07-27T20:33:00.002+01:00

Alien Tattoo.

2008-07-27T20:23:00.000+01:00

Mr.T: Not A Fan Of Speedwalking.

2008-07-27T20:20:00.000+01:00

Zen.

2008-07-24T23:18:00.002+01:00

“Blood is just red sweat.”

- Enson Inoue.

If Physical Theories Were Women.

2008-07-24T23:15:00.001+01:00

From the always amazing McSweeney's. Click through for more comparisons.

0. Newtonian gravity is your high-school girlfriend. As your first encounter with physics, she's amazing. You will never forget Newtonian gravity, even if you're not in touch very much anymore.

1. Electrodynamics is your college girlfriend. Pretty complex, you probably won't date long enough to really understand her.

2. Special relativity is the girl you meet at the dorm party while you're dating electrodynamics. You make out. It's not really cheating because it's not like you call her back. But you have a sneaking suspicion she knows electrodynamics and told her everything.

3. Quantum mechanics is the girl you meet at the poetry reading. Everyone thinks she's really interesting and people you don't know are obsessed about her. You go out. It turns out that she's pretty complicated and has some issues. Later, after you've broken up, you wonder if her aura of mystery is actually just confusion.

4. General relativity is your high-school girlfriend all grown up. Man, she is amazing. You sort of regret not keeping in touch. She hates quantum mechanics for obscure reasons.

It's Like That.

2008-07-24T23:02:00.002+01:00

This guy got served.

Robot Restaurant Mystery Solved.

2008-07-24T22:53:00.002+01:00

It's actually run by clones. Or Terminators.

The mystery of how a Chinese couple seemingly managed to run a busy restaurant 21 hours a day has been solved.

The restaurant, in Yiwu, is actually run by two couples - and both the men and the women are identical twins.

[...]

Locals had nicknamed the eatery the "robot couple restaurant" as they couldn't understand how the same couple seemed to be on duty from 6am through to 3am.

However, a journalist from Today Morning Post interviewed the restaurant owner and found out the truth.

It turned out that the twin brothers, 32, married a set of twin sisters from the same township three years ago and moved to Yiwu to run the restaurant together.

"Many diners thought we worked too hard and are like robots, but they don't know that we are actually four people," said Mao Zhanghua, 32, the elder brother.

The couples say they are very happy running their restaurant, because it allows them to live together like a big family - and they quite like the robot nickname which they say aptly describes their busy lives.

I Thought Apollo Was Faked.

2008-07-24T22:39:00.003+01:00

Former NASA astronaut and moon-walker Dr Edgar Mitchell - a veteran of the Apollo 14 mission - has stunningly claimed aliens exist.

And he says extra-terrestrials have visited Earth on several occasions - but the alien contact has been repeatedly covered up by governments for six decades.

Dr Mitchell, 77, said during a radio interview that sources at the space agency who had had contact with aliens described the beings as 'little people who look strange to us.'

He said supposedly real-life ET's were similar to the traditional image of a small frame, large eyes and head.

Chillingly, he claimed our technology is "not nearly as sophisticated" as theirs and "had they been hostile", he warned "we would be been gone by now".

Dr Mitchell, along with with Apollo 14 commander Alan Shepard, holds the record for the longest ever moon walk, at nine hours and 17 minutes following their 1971 mission.

"I happen to have been privileged enough to be in on the fact that we've been visited on this planet and the UFO phenomena is real," Dr Mitchell said.

"It's been well covered up by all our governments for the last 60 years or so, but slowly it's leaked out and some of us have been privileged to have been briefed on some of it.

"I've been in military and intelligence circles, who know that beneath the surface of what has been public knowledge, yes - we have been visited. Reading the papers recently, it's been happening quite a bit."

Chimp Disarms Zoo Keeper.

2008-07-24T22:28:00.000+01:00

Healthy Food Has Half The Calories, So We Can Eat Twice As Much.

2008-07-24T22:21:00.002+01:00

Nice Shirt.

2008-07-24T22:08:00.000+01:00

The Joker's Creator On The Dark Knight.

2008-07-24T21:02:00.002+01:00

Every last of you should have seen The Dark Knight by now. If not, I have a magic trick for you.

Go watch it. Then you may come back and agree with this guy.

Beware, for the following article contains spoilers:

The actor who plays the Joker in a blockbuster 2008 movie is gone. The cartoonist who created the Joker in 1939 is still around.

He's Jerry Robinson, and he thinks the late Heath Ledger's acting turn in "The Dark Knight" is "a tour de force."

"A brilliant performance," said Robinson, 86, when E&P reached him by phone at the currently running Comic-Con in San Diego. "Very nuanced. The Joker is psychotic, but you believe in Heath's portrayal."

How does Ledger's portrayal of the supervillain compare with Jack Nicholson's hammy turn in the 1989 "Batman" film? "They're really different," replied Robinson, who has also had a long career in newspaper cartooning and syndication. "Nicholson made him kind of a mad terrorist. It wasn't exactly the most interesting view of him. It was more of a satirical, TV take on the Joker -- though it was a great performance."

Robinson said the way "The Dark Knight" and Ledger portray the Joker is closer to the way the character was conceived nearly 70 years ago. Back then, Robinson was a teenage Columbia University journalism student working on comic books with "Batman" creator Bob Kane. And the name of sidekick Robin is derived from Jerry's last name.

For "The Dark Knight," Robinson served as "creative consultant." He was on the set of the movie last fall in London, after filming moved from Chicago.

Robinson recalled that the scene in which the Joker threw the Rachel Dawes character (played by Maggie Gyllenhaal) out a window was first shot in Chicago and then finished in London -- where Batman (played by Christian Bale) saves Rachel before she hits the ground. Robinson joked that being thrown out of a window in America and landing in another continent is quite a feat.

The cartoonist also said the movie makeup of Aaron Eckhart (Harvey Dent/Two-Face) was digital, not actually applied to his face. "I spent a lot of time on the set with the makeup artist, and she didn't mention him," recalled Robinson. "Now I know why!"

Bale, recalled Robinson, "was an interesting guy" to talk with on the London set. "Very literate and articulate," said the cartoonist. (Bale has since landed in some hot water with this week's report of his arrest for allegedly assaulting his mother and sister; the actor denies the charges.)

Robinson didn't meet Ledger in London; the actor had finished his Joker scenes and flown back to the U.S. at that point. Ledger died this January in New York City of an apparent drug overdose.

"It's such a tragedy," said Robinson, who added that there had been plans for he and Ledger to get together in New York.

The cartoonist did see various "Dark Knight" actors at last week's New York premiere of the movie. They included Bale again, Gary Oldman (who played Lt. James Gordon in the film), and Michael Caine (Alfred Pennyworth). Robinson said Caine was so good in the role of the butler to Bruce Wayne -- aka Batman -- that he'd like to see the character focused on in another movie.

Robinson also ran into Danny DeVito, who played the Penguin earlier in the "Batman" movie series. The Penguin was a character Robinson also drew during his comic book days.

What did Robinson think of "The Dark Knight" in general? The cartoonist replied that he was very impressed with it, though he didn't find the film perfect. For one thing, said Robinson, it could've been tightened up in a way that would've made it about 15 minutes shorter.

And did Robinson expect the movie to pull in a record $158.4 million during its first weekend? "I knew it would be big, but didn't think it would be THAT big," commented the cartoonist, who said he's contractually not allowed to comment on how much he might or might not make with the movie. Like most cartoonists who worked decades ago, Robinson didn't have ownership rights to characters he created.

Zen.

2008-07-16T23:34:00.000+01:00

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.”

- Mark Twain.

They Try To Make Me Go To Rehab So I Don't Blow, Blow, Blow.

2008-07-16T23:28:00.002+01:00

The Times reports on a rehabilitation centre for Jihadists.

It has been called the Betty Ford clinic for jihadists and within minutes of arriving at the Care Rehabilitation Centre on the outskirts of Riyadh, you can see why. The small complex, where the Saudi Arabian government is exploring a new way of reforming its wayward radicals, feels more like an exclusive boarding school than a Saudi jail.

Inmates have access to swimming pools, table tennis and PlayStations. In the evenings, guards and prisoners play football. An air-conditioned tent sits adjacent to the sports field, serving as a dining hall and common room where, when I visited, the prisoners were tucking into rice and lamb with fresh fruit for pudding.

In return for this privileged treatment, the prisoners – Islamic extremists, some of whom are convicted murderers – are obliged to attend lessons based around Islamic law and the jurisprudence of jihad. A team of psychologists teaches detainees how they should manage their emotions, particularly when reacting to world events.

Art therapy classes help inmates to “reveal their softer side”. And it is not just the artwork that is surreal. It is quite a sight to see men in flowing robes, with unkempt beards and their trousers hoisted above their ankles, sit down with a pack of crayons to express themselves. “The unconscious mind holds a lot of things,” said the therapist.

The Saudi government insists all this is necessary to promote genuine rehabilitation and foster a meaningful relationship with the jihadists. But in the easy-going atmosphere of the “resort” – nobody calls it a prison – where inmates are referred to as “beneficiaries”, it is easy to forget the seriousness of some of their crimes.

The centre is divided into six areas, four of which hold Saudi nationals who fought (or tried to) in Iraq. The other two hold returnees from Guantanamo Bay.

Human Mirror.

2008-07-16T23:21:00.000+01:00

15 pairs of twins create a human mirror on a New York subway car.

Fail.

2008-07-16T23:10:00.001+01:00

The Origins of Your Favorite Condiments.

2008-07-16T23:04:00.002+01:00

From Mental Floss:

Ketchup

The word “ketchup” comes from the Chinese “ke-tsiap,” and if you’re wondering why ketchup isn’t used in Chinese food, well, there’s your story. Ke-tsiap wasn’t at all like ketchup. It was a sauce made from pickled fish that frankly wouldn’t taste so great on a burger – or in our opinion on much else. Nonetheless, it was popular enough to catch on in Malaysia, where it was called “kechap,” and Indonesia (“ketjap”), and to be honest it probably wasn’t as bad as it sounds; it’s been compared to soy sauce. When English and Dutch sailors made their way to the Far East in the 17th century, they “discovered” the sauce and brought some back with them. Homemade versions immediately became popular; Elizabeth Smith’s The Compleat Housewife (copyright 1727) called for anchovies, shallots, vinegar, white wine, cloves, ginger, mace, nutmeg, pepper, and lemon peel.

Note the lack of tomatoes in that recipe. In the grand East-meets-West tradition of fusion cuisine, someone thought to add tomatoes to ke-tsiap in the early 1700s. The British counterpart of that person, by the way, went another direction and added mushrooms instead; you can still find mushroom ketchup at a few specialty retailers, and The New Joy of Cooking contains a recipe for the homemade stuff. Anyway, in both nations, the spelling also mutated around the same time; the first reference to “ketchup” appeared in 1711. This, too, caught on, and within 100 years or so ke-tsiap had acquired yet another regional name: tomato soy. Teresa Heinz Kerry’s great-great-great in-laws started selling a thin, salty version of the stuff in as “tomato ketchup” in 1876, and it was such a hit that eventually they just dropped the “tomato.”

Andy Dick Lives Up To His Name.

2008-07-16T22:56:00.001+01:00

Andy Dick was arrested early Wednesday for investigation of drug use and sexual battery after the comedian allegedly pulled down a teenager's top, police said.

The former co-star of the TV sitcom "NewsRadio" was released from a detention center after posting $5,000 bail. Calls to his representatives seeking comment were not immediately returned.

Police were called to the Buffalo Wild Wings in Murrieta at about 1:13 a.m. to investigate a report of "an intoxicated male" urinating outside the bar and causing a disturbance, according to a police statement.

When they arrived, a 17-year-old girl told police that she was outside when Dick left the bar, walked up, "grabbed her tank top and bra and pulled them down and exposed her breasts," the statement said.

Friends escorted Dick to a truck, which officers stopped at a nearby Sam's Club, police said.

Dick was identified by the teenager and a witness, police said.

Marijuana and the drug Xanax were found his pants pockets during a search and he appeared "extremely intoxicated," police said.

Dick, 42, was booked at Southwest Detention Center in French Valley on suspicion of felony possession of a controlled substance, misdemeanor sexual battery and misdemeanor possession of marijuana.

Let's Never Fight Again.

2008-07-16T22:46:00.000+01:00

Oh Dear.

2008-07-16T22:37:00.000+01:00

Man Cuts Off Own Head With Chainsaw.

2008-07-16T22:31:00.002+01:00

The Daily Mail:

A ‘vulnerable’ man cut off his own head with a chainsaw after being ordered to move out of his home to make way for developers, police believe.

David Phyall’s severed head was found beside the power tool inside his housing association flat shortly after receiving his eviction notice.

Detectives were today investigating the possibility that the 58-year-old killed himself rather than leave his home of eight years.
David Phyall's flat

He was the last resident living on an estate earmarked for demolition. All 71 surrounding flats were empty.

Paramedics and police made the gruesome find after receiving a 999 call.

An inquest is now being carried out into the exact cause of death and what had happened to Mr Phyall, described as ‘vulnerable’, beforehand.

It is understood police are not treating his death as suspicious.

Mr Phyall had lived in his flat at Bishopstoke in Eastleigh, Eastley, Hants, since 2000 and was fighting to stay there despite plans to bulldoze the entire area and rebuild it.

Many flats had already been boarded up.

Mr Phyall rented the property from Atlantic Housing Ltd.

He had been unhappy since the plans to level the flats and rebuild them were passed in 2006.

It is thought that he may have even been served with an eviction notice issued through the courts shortly before his death.

An inquest opened and adjourned by deputy central Hampshire coroner Simon Burge.

It listed the possible cause of death of Mr Phyall as ‘complete transaction of the neck’ and ‘chainsaw wound to the neck.’

Zen.

2008-07-14T23:11:00.005+01:00

“Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet.”

- Chuck Palahniuk.

The Closer You Get to Being a Pro, The Closer You Can Get to The Client.

2008-07-14T23:04:00.004+01:00

:3

2008-07-14T23:04:00.001+01:00

Why So Serious?

2008-07-14T22:57:00.000+01:00

Two Brits have been jailed in Ibiza for beating up a man while dressed as Batman and Robin.

The unnamed pair, both 18, were returning from a party in the resort of San Antonio when they got in an argument with their victim.

The 30-year-old Spaniard lost three teeth in the attack in the early hours of Wednesday. Both men were sentenced to a year in jail and ordered to pay £5,000 compensation.

They will be released and have their sentences suspended when the money is paid.

A third arrested Brit, dressed as Batman’s arch-enemy The Joker, was cleared of any involvement.

Mind The Fap.

2008-07-14T22:47:00.000+01:00

Where is This 'Dachau' You Speak Of?

2008-07-14T22:44:00.000+01:00

Hand in Your Geek Cards.

2008-07-14T22:18:00.003+01:00

You may be a geek.

You may spend ridiculous amounts of time and money on inconsequential things: books, films, music, the odd video game, martial arts; your social life might be shot to the point where your girlfriend's last name is .jpeg; you may have spoken long and eloquently about why Kirk is better than Picard, with fervour last seen from James Stewart's character in Mr.Smith Goes to Washington.

You may even know the proper use of a semicolon.

You will never however approach 'cardboard Halo costume' level.

The Claw Is Our Master. It Decides Who Will Go And Who Will Stay.

2008-07-14T22:13:00.001+01:00

Braniac shows us how to beat that annoying crane game.

Zen.

2008-07-06T23:08:00.001+01:00

“Anger is a killing thing: it kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had been before - it takes something from him.”

- Louis L'Amour.

Friends With Benefits.

2008-07-06T22:58:00.002+01:00

A detailed breakdown of exactly what benefactions one may receive from having a friend with benefits, as opposed to a traditional relationship.

Click for bigger.

Must be Tripping on Eggstacy.

2008-07-06T22:57:00.000+01:00

Techno Chicken.

Nice Guys Really Do Finish Last.

2008-07-06T22:41:00.002+01:00

Two studies have confirmed what most nice guys have been complaining about since time immemorial. The first had a small pool of samples, all of 200 college students, but the second is a survey of 35,000 people across 57 countries. Both studies seem to indicate that those with the so-called 'dark triad' of personality traits have a good chance of reproductive success, despite being jackasses.

.pdf from New Scientist.

The traits are the self-obsession of narcissism; the impulsive, thrill-seeking and callous behaviour of psychopaths; and the deceitful and exploitative nature of Machiavellianism. At their extreme, these traits would be highly detrimental for life in traditional human societies.

People with these personalities risk being shunned by others and shut out of relationships, leaving them without a mate, hungry and vulnerable to predators.

But being just slightly evil could have an upside: a prolific sex life...

[...]

David Schmitt of Bradley University in Peoria, Illinois, presented preliminary results at the same meeting from a survey of more than 35,000 people in 57 countries. He found a similar link between the dark triad and reproductive success in men.

“It is universal across cultures for high dark triad scorers to be more active in short-term mating,” Schmitt says. “They are more likely to try and poach other people’s partners for a brief affair.”

Barbara Oakley of Oakland University in Rochester, Michigan, says that the studies
“verify something a lot of people have conjectured about.” Christopher von Rueden of the University of California at Santa Barbara says that the studies are important because they confirm that personality variation has direct fitness consequences.

“They still have to explain why it hasn’t spread to everyone,” says Matthew Keller of the University of Colorado in Boulder. “There must be some cost of the traits.”
One possibility, both Keller and Jonason suggest, is that the strategy is most successful when dark triad personalities are rare. Otherwise, others would become
more wary and guarded.

Christian The Lion.

2008-07-06T22:01:00.000+01:00

The song's a bit much, but this is a genuinely touching video.

Where is Your God Now?

2008-07-06T21:52:00.003+01:00

Pranksters fake The Rapture, leaving an Evangelical Christian believing she was left behind. The look of horror on her face when she realizes she's doomed to suffer the reign of the Anti-Christ is priceless.

65 Things That Look Like Pacman.

2008-07-02T14:55:00.001+01:00

A gallery.

Masturbating Walrus Dies.

2008-07-02T14:38:00.003+01:00

Maybe he had a stroke.

Ayveq, the walrus whose bizarre, though oddly compelling, masturbation rituals made him an international sensation at the New York Aquarium, has died. He was 14.

Though well-liked long before he discovered the habit that would make him a star, Ayveq’s frequent public self-gratification made him the Coney Island institution’s singular attraction.

“We are all still in shock about it,” Aquarium Director Jon Forrest Dohlin said. “He was an absolute delight. He had a magnetism and a charm that was totally his own. He loved people and he knew how to work a crowd and entertain guests.

“And himself,” Dohlin added. “He did have a raffish charm, no doubt about it.”

The Aquarium said workers discovered that Avyeq was ailing on Sunday, June 15.

“On Saturday night, he was perfect — no problems at all,” said Dohlin, “but the next morning, we could see that he was not right.”

Within one week, he was dead, most likely of a “massive” bacterial infection, Dohlin said.

“We tried everything, but it progressed so rapidly,” he said.

The exact cause of death will not be known until an autopsy.

Martian Soil Can Grow Asparagus.

2008-07-02T14:32:00.002+01:00

No wonder it's a dead planet.

BBC:

Martian soil appears to contain sufficient nutrients to support life - or, at least, asparagus - Nasa scientists believe.

Preliminary analysis by the $420m (£210m) Phoenix Mars Lander mission on the planet's soil found it to be much more alkaline than expected.

Scientists working on the spacecraft project said they were "flabbergasted" by the discovery.

The find has raised hopes conditions on Mars may be favourable for life.

"We basically have found what appears to be the requirements, the nutrients, to support life, whether past, present or future," said Sam Kounaves, the project's lead chemist, from the University of Arizona.

Although he said further tests would have to be conducted, Mr Kounaves said the soil seemed "very friendly… there is nothing about it that is toxic," he said.

"It is the type of soil you would probably have in your back yard - you know, alkaline. You might be able to grow asparagus in it really well."

Zen.

2008-07-01T23:52:00.001+01:00

“...the music of freedom frightens people and unleashes all manner of conservative defense mechanisms.”

- Salman Rushdie.

So You Are.

2008-07-01T23:51:00.000+01:00

Fuck Off, Gillette.

2008-07-01T23:41:00.003+01:00

The Telegraph:

Stubble is the way to win a woman’s heart, a study has shown. Researchers found that women are more attracted to men with stubbly chins than those with clean-shaven faces or full beards.

Women participating in the research rated men with stubble as tough, mature, aggressive, dominant and masculine - and as the best romantic partners, either for a fling or a long-term relationships.

The findings of the experiment, carried out on British women aged 18 to 44, could explain the appeal of actors such as George Clooney and Brad Pitt who cultivate their unshaven look.

The explanation for the preference is not clear, but experts in human evolution say that that facial hair may be a signal of aggression because it boosts the apparent size of the lower jaw, emphasising the teeth as weapons.

Psychologists at Northumbria University who carried out the new study believe that stubbly men may offer women the best worlds - not too strongly masculine, but mature and with the potential to grow a full beard.

Zero Punctuation: MGS 4.

2008-07-01T23:40:00.000+01:00

7 People From Around the World With Real Mutant Superpowers.

2008-07-01T23:30:00.003+01:00

Number 1's a cracker. The Godhand (yes, he really is called that) has been synonymous with 'awesome' for a long, long time - I can't imagine anyone else more deserving. Jet Pack guy should not be there though since he doesn't have mutant powers.

#7.
Das Uberboy

Real Name: Unknown

Uberboy's name is being kept secret, presumably to protect the lives of his loved ones once Uberboy dons a mask and begins patrolling the streets of the world righting wrongs.

Superpower: Bona fide Super-Strength.

One day in 1999 a little baby boy was born in Germany, at first glance no different from any other. But, the nurses noticed that the baby's muscles were twitching and called the doctors to check him out. We can only assume Uberbaby was showing off his guns to the ladies since when doctors examined the kid, they reached a unanimous conclusion: he was ripped as hell.

But how did this happen? Was there a fully equipped gym inside his mom's uterus? No, as it turns out that's an extraordinarily stupid idea. It's actually a real X-Men-style genetic mutation that changes the way his body controls muscle growth. Cattle farmers have been intentionally using it for years to breed huge, muscular cows.

It's not clear what will happen as Uberboy grows up. All we have is this quote that is from The Washington Post despite sounding like it's from a Marvel origin: "But inasmuch as no one has ever encountered a child such as this boy or studied animals with defective myostatin genes into old age, his health--and eventual strength--remains unknown."

What we do know is that at 4-years-old, Uberboy could lift six times more weight than an average kid. If in a few years you see a guy clubbing a bank robber in the head with a minivan, you'll know what the hell is going on.

Scientists, instead of building giant laser shooting robots to hunt him down, decided to study him and try to find ways to use this new knowledge to help people with muscle dystrophy. And by that we assume they mean turn regular people into muscle-bound supermen to populate their Army of Doom.

2 Girls, 1 Bomb.

2008-07-01T23:13:00.004+01:00

Reuters:

A woman trying to make "manure bombs" using stockings, slipped into a slurry tank and fled the scene naked, German police said Friday.

Two women entered a farm in the northern village of Eberholzen Wednesday evening and started to fill the stockings with manure.

"One of them slipped into the manure tank, right into the cow muck," said a spokesman for local police. "The other one helped her out. We found their clothes in a field. One seems to have run off completely naked, the other in her underwear."

Police said it was unclear what the women had intended to do with the "manure bombs," but added the incident could be linked to victory celebrations surrounding the Euro 2008 semi-finals on Wednesday evening, when Germany beat Turkey 3-2.

"The women can get their clothes back from the local police station -- unwashed," the spokesman added.

The article doesn't say if the two BFFs were ever caught. I guess naked women running around covered in feces are a common sight in the area.

Biomechanical Building.

2008-07-01T23:05:00.000+01:00

'Get it Up Ye' Still Gets Nothing.

2008-07-01T22:51:00.002+01:00

Write ‘f*** off’ on a GCSE paper and you’ll get 7.5%. Add an exclamation mark and it’ll go up to 11%.

Pupils are being rewarded for writing obscenities in their GCSE English examinations even when it has nothing to do with the question.

One pupil who wrote “f*** off” was given marks for accurate spelling and conveying a meaning successfully.

His paper was marked by Peter Buckroyd, a chief examiner who has instructed fellow examiners to mark in the same way. He told trainee examiners recently to adhere strictly to the mark scheme, to the extent that pupils who wrote only expletives on their papers should be awarded points.

Mr Buckroyd, chief examiner of English for the Assessment and Qualifications Alliance (AQA), an examination board, said that he had given the pupil two marks, out of a possible 27, for the expletive.

To gain minimum marks in English, students must demonstrate “some simple sequencing of ideas” and “some words in appropriate order”. The phrase had achieved this, according to Mr Buckroyd.

The chief examiner, who is responsible for standards in exams taken by 780,000 candidates and for training for 3,000 examiners, told The Times: “It would be wicked to give it zero, because it does show some very basic skills we are looking for – like conveying some meaning and some spelling.

“It’s better than someone that doesn’t write anything at all. It shows more skills than somebody who leaves the page blank.”